Election - Tracy's I'm not mad monologue

You might think that it upset me that Paul Metzler had decided to run against me. But nothing could be farther from the truth. He was no competion for me. It was like apples and oranges. I had to work a little harder, that's all. You see, I believe in the voters. They understand that elections aren't just popularity contests. They know this country was built by people just like me who work very hard and don't have everything handed to them on a silver spoon. Not like some rich kids who everybody likes because their father owns Metzler's cement and give them trucks on their 16th birthday and throw them big parties all the time. No, they don't ever have to work for anything. They think they can just all of the sudden, one day, out of the blue waltz right in with no qualifications whatsoever and try to take away what other people have worked very, very hard their whole lives. No, it didn't bother me at all!

Boy, I like that movie. Pick Flick! :)

Deep thoughts - School

Here are some helpful back to school tips from our buddy Jack Handey:

- Instead of studying for finals, what about just going to the Bahamas and catching some rays? Maybe you'll flunk, but you might have flunked anyway; that's my point.
- If you want to be the most popular person in your class, whenever the professor pauses in his lecture, just let out a big snort and say "How do you figger that!" real loud. Then lean back and sort of smirk.
-I think college administrators should encourage students to urinate on walls and bushes because then when the students from another college come sniffing around they'll know this is someone else's territory.
- Children need encouragement. If a kid gets an answer right, tell him it was a lucky guess. That way he develops a good lucky feeling.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith movie review

Whatasupersuprise! I saw a movie! I bet you are shocked! I bet that you didn't think I was the movie type. Just kidding!

Open to Mr. and Mrs. Smith trying to explain their love life to an off screen therapist...very ackward. They are both assassins but they don't know that their spouse is too. Jane is a high tech assassin. Her office is sleek and clean while John's office looks like a dump. Even his coffee mug is old and ugly looking. When the couple finally figure out that they are enemies working for different companies they try to take eachother out. A couple of accidenally attempted murders and this happy couple is headed for splitsville. Vince Vaughn is just awesome as Jack's co-worker and buddy. Watch this movie if you've ever wanted a reason to kill your wife...or if you think Brad Pitts a hottie.

I give this movie 4 movie reels out of 5.

Thing I bought at the mall today

Large card storage box from Hallmark
Three "thinking of you" Hallmark cards
Napoloen Dynamite on DVD
Black high heel shoes
Black dress socks

Ode to apple juice

Another love song but this one is not about a boy or girl it's about apple juice

Smooth, but tangy it goes down so easy
and the colour is pretty cool
Oh, how I love my apple juice

I can put it in my fridge to keep it from going bad
But if you leave it in my room for a week it will go mouldy
Oh, how I love my apple juice

The lid always pops off with a happy little snap
Unlike pop if you pour it in a cup it won't foam over
Oh, how I love my apple juice

Orange juice sucks in comparison to you
Too sweet or sour and puply - is that a word?
I will always love you apple juice

Things I bought at the mall today

Gray pants
Black turtleneck
"What about Bob?" on DVD
Jerry Seinfeld's "I'm telling you this for the last time" on DVD
Survivor bracelet charm (also lost today...very sad)

Dukes of Hazard movie review

Ok, I admit it. I have a problem. I go to too many movies...but I like them. I like movies and and movie quotes and actors and all that other junk. I could be out smoking, drinking, doing drugs, etc. but I'm just not that type of person. So, get some low-fat microwave popcorn and enjoy the movie...review.

The movie begins with what else but a car chase. It's in the typical Dukes of Hazard style. I never saw the show myself but this is what I am told. Believe it or not but I didn't know why those cousins were called "The Dukes of Hazard". If you don't know either let me tell you so we can both feel cool. Their last name is Duke and they live in Hazard county. Seems simple but it's not. The Duke cousins are getting ready for a weekend race. Turns out their favourite racer is even coming to race them. But the race is a decoy for something else (I'm not telling you what :P) so the Dukes are torn between the race and what the race is distracting everyone from noticing. The movie is suprisingly pretty funny and well done. The plot is pretty easy to follow, that's how it's supposed to be. The only downside to the movie was Jessica Simpson. Granted, even if she did a real bang-up job I still wouldn't like it but she didn't so I don't have to worry. :) I loved all the crazy driving stunts they did. I also liked when they froze the movie in mid-action and a commentator cracked a joke. It wasn't exactly like the show. Boss Hog is skinny and Uncle Jessy hit someone. But for someone that never saw the show, I quite liked it.

If you like comedies that are easy to follow along then you should go see this movie.
I give this movie 3 1/2 movie reels out of 5.

How to survive a broken heart - Ben Lee

I really, really love this song. I've liked it for a long time. It's off the "There's something about Mary" soundtrack. I listened to this song so much when my boyfriend and I broke up. I don't know what's so special about it but I like it, I like it alot. This posting is for my bestest buddy Ashley. I'm always her for you chica. We could go and grab a snack at the back pack shack and maybe get some slacks and knick knacks.

I should let this go but I just can't and now it's just a lesson I can't grasp
So what's really the best that I could do, to hope to see you every year or two?
And the things you said do they still make sense?
Could you mean them now?
Did you even mean them then?
I could torture myself Insane and tense but I don't have the strength.
I'm crushed in pain you drifted through my life but even looking back I know it's right.
I gave you my heart scared complete and whole when all you ever asked for was my soul.
And there's nothing left but a song or two that mean not a thing If I can't play them for you.
If I could hear your voice just one more time maybe I'd be fine.
But I guess I won't 'cause it's too late now and I guess you're gone 'cause it's too late now.
And the pain I feel Is all I can take maybe this turn of karma is too late.
Maybe I was wrong maybe I was caught in a net of passion maybe I was caught.
Maybe I should take it all with salt and soon I'll believe that it's not my fault.
And it's not my fault and it's not my fault and it's not my fault and it's not my fault and it's not my fault and it's not my fault If I say it enough I'll believe that It's not my fault

Four brothers movie review

This movie begins with what is unfortunatly normal in Detroit, a robbery and a double homicide. The four Mercer brothers (Mark Wahlberg - Bobby, Tyrese Gibson - Angel, Andre Benjamin - Jeremiah, Garrett Hedlund - Jack) return home to get revenge on anyone who had anything to do with their foster mother's murder. As the story unravels it seems to have been more of an execution than just being at the wrong place at the wrong time. The Mercer brothers are on the case. Their interogation method of choice? Covering people in gasoline and threatening to light them on fire. Come to think of it that's my favourite one too! With such a heavy polt and so much killing the Mercer brothers show us their lighter side. Wether it's Bobby informing a cop that he's straightish, Angel's wacko Latino girlfriend freaking out at him and swearing in spanish, or Jeremiah telling his brothers that he can't help them beat someone up because he has to take his daughters to gymnastics, the laughs are there. It's a real whodunit. The movie leads you around to all sorts of scenarios and suspects. Was it an accident? Did Jeremiah have something to do with it? Was it the town's head honcho? Watch this movie and you'll find out.

I give this movie 4 out of 5 movie reels.

Mr. "Nice" Guy

Ok, now I'm mad. There was this really super nice guy and he gave me his phone number and I gave him mine. We had been talking every time he came into my bank and sometimes I even thought we were flirting. He said he would call me on the weekend...then he didn't. So, I let it go, no big deal. Then, he came into my work and said sorry for not calling and he'd call me soon...and then he didn't. I was a bit upset he did that again. So, just recenlty I called him just to see what was up. I never yelled at him for not calling or talked about it at all. He mentioned that he had been very busy with his church and asked me to go for lunch. We decided that today (Tuesday) would be the best day to meet up. I was so happy. I even wore this really nice shirt that I hate to wear but this was a special occasion. My lunch hour has pretty much gone and still no sign of "Mr. Nice Guy". Boys should have to wear special signs when they walk around that say either "I call people when I say I will" or " I don't call people when I'm supposed to". It would really help me out. I would have much rather he tell me up front he just wants to be friends or he's not interested. That's all fine with me. What I can't stand are these stupid sit around and wait games that guys (and girls) play. Will he call? Will he show up? Does he like me? If people were just more honest about their intentions then I could spend my time liking someone worthwhile. In the mean time I'm fuming about Mr. Gave-you-my-number-and-didn't-call-then-said-sorry-and-did-it-again-THEN-when-you-called-me-I-asked-you-to-lunch-and-then-didn't-show-so-now-you-are-confused-and-I-am-oblivious-to-the-whole-situation.

Red Eye movie review

So I saw the movie Red Eye with my friend Osme today. It was a above average. Didn't really have time to get bored because it's only 80-something minutes long. It was a pretty good thriller, the ending was a bit predictable but then again most movies are. The plot was pretty basic and easy to follow but when it was over we were left with a few questions.
Rachel McAdams did a great job playing Lisa. Finally a female character with some nerve when faced with an unpleasant and possible deadly situation. The lead male/bad guy (don't know his name) wasn't very believable as a nice guy in the beginning of the movie but he was a pretty creepy bad guy. And a ditzy co-worker of Lisa's added some comic relief when needed.
I give this movie 3 and 1/2 movie reels out of 5.

Dilbert

Dilbert is my favourite comic. Here's the dialogue from one of my favourites, originally published on May 9th, 2004.

Dilbert: Can I talk to you after the manditory meeting?
Pointy-haired boss: Whoa! Whoa! I didn't give you approval to attending that meeting.
Dilbert: The meeting is manditory.
P.H. Boss: Approval is mandatory too.
Dilbert: Okay, whatever. May I go to the MANDATORY meeting?
P.H. Boss: All requests must be in writing.
Dilbert: IT'S MANDATORY!!! MAN-DUH-TORY!!!
P.H. Boss: If people start bending the rules, before long, murder will be legal.
-Later-
Wally: That was the finest mandatory meeting I've ever attended! They handed out cash!
Dlbert: Shut up.

Deep Thoughts

If you ever watched SNL during the early to mid 90's you probably saw a segment called "Deep Thoughts - by Jack Handy". Thanks to the awesomeness of technology I was able to get a hold of most (if not all) of these so called deep thought quotes. Here are some of my all-time favourite random deep thoughts:

• If you ever drop your keys into a river of molton lava, forget em' cause, man, they're gone.
• I think my new thing will be to try to be a real happy guy. I'll just walk around being real happy until some jerk says something stupid to me.
• Of all the imaginary friends I've had, I don't think there was one that I didn't end up having to kill.
• If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater because then people would sing about me and I could fly down and eat then because I hate that song.

Many more to come!

Back home

Hi all,

Well, I'm back home now but I'm still on holidays until Monday. Did you miss me? Did you even know I was gone? :) I'm at the library today looking for some books on psychology, sociology, and sign language. I am hoping to get into a teacher's assistant program next September so I thought those books would be somewhat of an asset. Plus, those types of things have always really interested me. If that course doesn't work out I don't really know what I'll do. It took me this long just to figure that out. Unfortunatly, most TAs just get part-time hours so it looks like I'll be at the bank for much longer than origionally planned. Well, I better start reading!

genben

Wake up

One of my favourite Alanis Morissette songs from Jagged Little Pill

You like snow but only if it's warm
You like rain but only if it's dry
No sentimental value to the rose that fell on your floor
No fundamental excuse for the granted I'm taken for

'Cause it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you

You like pain but only if it doesn't hurt too much
And you sit and you wait to receive
There's an obvious attraction to the path of least resistance in your life
There's an obvious aversion no amount of my insistence could make you try tonight

'Cause it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you

There's no love no money no thrill anymore

There's an apprehensive naked little trembling boy with his head in his hands
There's an underestimated and impatient little girl raising her hand

But it's easy not to
So much easier not to
And what goes around never comes around to you

get up get up get up off of it x2
get out get outta here enough already
get up get up get up off of it

Wake up

Alternative uses for crayons

I've run out of things to say at the moment. That's really sad because I haven't been doing this whole blog thing for very long but give me a break cause I'm on vacation...ok? So I looked at this website that gives you ideas and it had the question "have you ever seen a dead body?" So, I skipped that one cause it's just too depressing right now and like I said I'm on vacation. So I looked for a happier question and there was one in particular that caught my eye, "Alternate uses for crayons". Why didn't I think of that? Gosh! I'm assuming they mean alternative to colouring.

So here's what I came up with:
- dog food when you're broke
- dog food when you're not broke
- melt it down and make it into a candle
- melt it down and use it as make-up
- melt it down and make a beautiful painting then sell it for $200,000,000.00
- melt it down and pour it on people (that you don't like or have a VERY good sense of humour)
- break it into pieces and throw it at customers that you don't like (or have a VERY good sense of humour)
- gave it to Ralphie from "The Simpsons" and he might stick it in his nose
- melt a red one and see if you can trick someone into thinking it's blood
- melt them down, put the crayon paper on the inside, add the wax to the outside, repackage them, open the box in front of your friends, and pretend that they just came that way
- try to build a real house with them. It will take a lot of time and money put if you pull it off people might think that you're cool.

That's pretty much all I can think of for this question. Let me know if you have any ideas of your own about this very important subject. :)

genben

Miss. Needaman

Ok, I know that I am young and have lots of time to find someone. This I know. What makes the whole thing so damn hard is that every single one of my girlfriends is marrried, soon to be married, or have a boyfriend. My ONE single friend is now an I used-to-be-single-but-now-I-have-a-boyfriend-so-I-don't-really-need-to-talk-to-you-all-the-time friend. She is already LIVING with her new beau. By the way things are progressing I wouldn't be suprised if they were married by the weekend. Can you say ugly bridesmaid dress? It doesn't help that there are games ie. Old maid to make young girls so afraid to grow old alone. The whole point of the game is to not get stuck with the single chick. It's kind of mean when you think about it. I have never imagined being a career woman and being too focused on my successful career to have a husband or kids. I want those. I don't want to be old with hundreds of cats...I'm more of a dog person. The problem is that I don't know how to go about this whole dating thing. It doesn't help that my social skills are non existant. Oh well...something to work on I guess. If anything remotely substantial in my dating life comes I'll let you know. In the mean time just call me Single and cynical...sorry, couldn't think of anything that started with an "s". :)

Funny T-Shirts I've seen

"She looked hot last night" - Billy-Bob Thornton in "Bad News Bears"
"Vote for Pedro" - Everyone since Napoleon Dynamite came out
"Do I look like a f*@#^!g people person?" - My buddy
"I'm a virgin but this is an old t-shirt" - Britney Spears (no joke!)

Some more that I remembered:
Oscar the grouch holding a sign that says "Support Grouches" - Me
"I’m not bossy I just have way better ideas than you." - I can't remember where I saw this one or even if it was on a t-shirt but it's funny so I'm adding it.

Feel free to add to the list.

Broken beyond repair

I can't believe she did it! I think everyone's still talking about it. I thought that she loved him. I guess I was wrong. I wonder what he'll do now that she left him for a surfer. I bet he's feeling pretty low. I don't know how she can sleep at night. I doubt anyone will care if they ever see him again now that he's been replaced. I bet she'll have some regrets about the whole thing at some point down the road. I fear that I'll never see him again in the supermarket or Toys 'R' Us. I suspect the surfer's tan is fake. I know that her hair is fake too. I hope that her ass starts to sag and her perky little boobs get wrinkly. I feel so bad for him. I hate her for hurting him like she did. I wish that he was with me. I would put him up in a nice place but I'll never have that chance now that he's gone. I just don't think I'll ever get over the breakup for Barbie and Ken.

Dreams

This one was a weird one...
I was on a cruise ship with my mom and dad. I bought a pull tab in the bar and won 169,600. My mom took the pull tab and said she would put it in a safe place. She went back to check on the pull tab but she couldn't find it. Some one had stolen it! I just knew that two 20-something guys that lived on the cruise ship had taken it so I went to investigate. One of the guys was named Trevor. He had blonde hair and blue eyes. I tried to hack into his computer to see if he e-mailed anyone about where he put my pull tab but as I am not a hacker by any means I was unsuccessful. My mom told me to distract guy number 2 (no name) to keep him away from Trevor's room so she could try to hack into his computer. My mom was also unsuccessful at hacking into Trevor's computer so she left. Guy #2 and I fell in love. We went to his room and he went on Trevor's computer and then went out of the room. I went onto Trevor's MSN and discovered that he did in fact steal the pull tab but I didn't know where he hid it. Guy #2 was sad about what he had done so he strapped a bomb on himself and blew up causing the cruise ship we were on to sink. Everyone was in the water and swiming to the cruise ship dock. A big killerwhale carried me on his back part of the way but then it turned into a white shark and tried to eat me. I kicked it in the head as it was coming at me. After that the shark left me alone. We all got to shore and I met up with my mom and dad. Our cruise ship had been magically repaired so we went back on it. I was looking at some brochures and saw a leather book in the brochure rack so I took it out and there was my pull tab! I was screaming and jumping around. My mom took it (again) and bought the cruise ship we were on. She was pretty happy but I was choked that I didn't get anything and it was my pull tab!